My Giant Roasted Pig

"What if I brought you a giant roasted pig?"

Feeling kind of under the weather, but also kind of gushy.

My Soju Dinner

Korean food cookoff.

Ingredients for Saturday, 10/24/2009:

4 pounds of kalbi, marinated in soy sauce, sugar, garlic, green onion, ginger, Asian pear, black pepper, and sesame oil.

1 giant pot of homemade chop jae.

1 rice cooker full of rice.

2 heads of lettuce.

1 tub of gochujang.

6 boys.

2 girls.

Yakult.

Soju.



Let it meld together into shitshowy goodness. So. Much. Fun.

We ate until we were practically comatose. Then we drank. And then we ate more. It was truly epic. Will plan an encore.

My Slow Panic

There is so much I have to do. It's all kind of just accumulating, one after another, and before I can finish anything off, my plate just gets piled higher with more. It's really starting to stress me out.

Especially vocal stuff. I am constantly in fear of not being good enough. Because I know I'm not. There is so much I don't know. And there is so much I need to improve on. I never feel like I'm making much progress, and it scares me to think that I'm not outrageously gifted in my new field. I just want to be better. But in spite of the fact that I am absolutely dedicated to my vocal studies, I don't seem to be improving. It makes me so... sigh.

To cope with that, I cooked a healthy meal for Mike's college-boy apartment. David and James always super grateful when I cook at their place, and we're all usually pretty productive with our studies after eating together. I miss family meals, and it actually really calms me to just sit down at the dinner table and share conversation and food.

Tonight's menu:
steamed tilapia filet with soy sauce, ginger, garlic, and green onions
rice
baked sweet potatoes for dessert

Healthy healthy :)

But now that it's over, I'm feeling a little antsy again. At least I'm much better than I was previous to my little de-stress sess.

My Wild Weekend

Being back in the bay was the most amazing feeling ever. San Diego's great. In fact it's so great that when I'm here, I don't think about the fact that I'm away from my beloved NorCal. But when I go home...

Man. Every time I go home, it just hits me like a ton of bricks how awesome the East Bay is. One day, I'm going to live there again. And it is going to rock my world.

So the concert. It was amazing. But it was also a complete shitshow. In other words, details elude me. However, I know that I spent a lot of time with great company (and managed to avoid the presence of others I'm not as particular to) And I know that I had the time of my life wandering the streets of Berkeley, being drunk on the BART, moseying down The Embarcadero, cavorting around AT&T Park, grinding to GirlTalk, watching some spectacular fireworks, playing flip cup, listening to MGMT, and really--REALLY--watching the sun set over the most beautiful city I have ever known from the shores of Treasure Island.

It's been a little rough adjusting back to school life... you know. Actually waking up in the morning. Not being perpetually crossfaded. Singing and having to sound good. Trying to pass midterms. That kind of thing.

What can I take from that weekend? I've made a few amazing friends. And I guess that boyfriend of mine ain't half bad either.

And... I miss my family.

My Homecoming

I'm going home. I'm going home. I'm going home. I'm going home!! Truly. I am sooo excited to be going home!!!!!!!

Along those lines, I pose a query:

Mike and I had decided to go to Norcal together to see MGMT. He bought us tickets for our second monthaversary (celebrating my longest college relationship!) Our iHouse friends got jealous. Understandably so because MGMT is awesome. So a few of them decided to buy tickets as well. Mina, the only one of Mike and my own group of friends who I really have to try to tolerate (I frickin LOVE the rest of our group) told some new international friends of theirs, and so they bought tickets. Problem is, Mina's driving. I'm driving. And she invited more people than she had room for. Mike and I were completely unaware of this until midnight. As in 10 hours ago. As far as we knew, we were heading up tonight with my little sister's boyfriend in tow. En route at 7 pm, in norcal by 2 am. No problemo. Not so anymore.

Not only did Mina try to unload both of her international friends (whom neither Mike nor myself have even met) onto my car, taking the rest of our gang with her, she tresspassed the boundaries of hospitality by having her two friends stay at Mike's Thursday night. And all day Friday. As I heard the conversation unfold in the car, I was fairly irked. I interrupted.

I told Mina I wouldn't take two complete strangers in my car, and it was unfair of her to dump her acquaintences on us while she and the rest of our gang were off cavorting elsewhere. I told her she shouldn't have assumed that having them tag along with us would be OK, especially considering this was originally a trip for US (Mike and I). She got really defensive, but eventually consented to let us take our friend Adam and one mystery passenger up. At least we know and love Adam.

This is exactly the kind of thing that really annoys me about Mina. She imposes herself. I don't feel like I was too harsh, but I really don't like hanging out with her, and I'd prefer not to in the future. Mike thinks "she's OK in small doses." Honestly, even the small doses make me want to sock her in the kisser.

This post has put me in a little bit of an angry disposition.

My Cooking

Eating out is a really expensive habit. And it's one that Mike has fallen into over the course of living off campus. Not that I can blame him. Left to his own devices, Mike would have to eat scrambled eggs and/or rice for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. In reality he has been eating pho nearly every day... twice a day if he's hungover. Pho might be cheap and filling for "eating out," but six bucks every single day adds up. Especially if you drag your girlfriend out to eat with you and insist on paying.

I had an epiphany... perhaps after one too many bowls of pho. I can cook. I'm not bad at it. Solution: I'll cook and we'll eat in.

We plan a few meals ahead and shop for groceries together. It's cute I guess. And it's really sweet how he always marvels at the food one can make with a dollar's worth of produce. It's also entertaining how fond of me his male roommates have become lately.

Friday:
-steamed rice
-beef n' broccoli

Saturday:
-steamed rice
-sauteed string beans and chicken
-fried eggs with tomato (sounds gross, but it's traditional Taiwanese fare and miraculously delicious)

Sunday:
-mac n' cheese w/ broccoli
-garlic bread

Monday:
-beef stew w/ daikon, carrots, and tomato
-steamed rice

Next on the menu is probably Japanese style curry chicken. And we'll see after that... :)

I love my boyfriend. I used to be really lazy to cook every day. But it's not as bad as I thought it'd be now that someone else never fails to appreciate it. Plus it's nice to unwind. Taking time away from academia to prepare a healthy meal de-stresses me.

My New Venture

I got a call from a dear friend yesterday. He had an interesting request. I took him up on it.

So tonight I'm going to be directing my first collegiate a cappella rehearsal. UCSD Frequency. Maybe this is my chance to make something great. Starting from... pretty much scratch.

More on this later, perhaps.



Other things:
-JAM WEDDING TONIGHT!!!!!!!!! ZOMGZOMGZOMG
-intramural dodgeball with Mike and his friends (they were lacking female players)
-lots of vocalizing
-slowly but surely transferring "We All Need Saving" into TTBB form... (<3)
-going home next weekend :)
-making Spring break plans with Mikey :)
-tea is 70 cents at the Sunshine Market :D
-my daddy's birthday is tomorrow :)

My Blehhhh

So I'm pretty sure I've mentioned that Mikey is not a morning person. This is inconvenient because he has morning classes. I hate it when he's a grumpster on the zillion-year car ride to campus. I know he's just groggy and mentally unengaged, but it still kind of stings when he's grouchy as fuck.

I am also feeling very yuck lately. I didn't even go to rehearsal last night because I was halfway passed out and crazy sore. It probably didn't help that working out kicked my butt. I need to start feeling better soon. Especially since my vocal lessons start today. Shiet. I am part excited, part scared. I really don't know what to expect. And I'm really scared I'll just never be as good as I could be.

Also, it would be nice if my practice room key card would work. It would be very nice. But that's just not happening at the moment. Sigh.

My Change Of Direction

(I did not mean for that to be a Street Fighter reference.)

So I know I had decided to be a vocal performance emphasis, but the fact of the matter is, there remained a degree of uncertainty up until about 11 am yesterday. That's when I was notified that I have been accepted as a voice student. Immense relief.

I guess that makes it official.

I made a new friend in the music department. Just thought I'd document it here. She's a vocalist as well, but she's a music literature emphasis. Transfer student from Orange County, born in Korea, moved here 12 years ago. I really like her. We suffer through Italian Madrigals together. And she just joined LJSC as well!

What's funny is that she got called back to Tritones auditions. How did I find this out? She was browsing the website before our Tuesday lecture and just happened to take a closer look at the picture on the website. I hadn't paid attention to what she was looking at on her computer, but I heard her gasp, and as I turned to her, she asked, "Is that you?!?!" Confused, I glanced toward the face her finger indicated, and was slightly taken aback to see myself beaming on the screen, fully decked out in ICCA gear, with an arm around Shana.

It just seems like so long ago. It's utterly foreign to me now. After a second or two of blank staring, I came to my senses and answered her, "yea. I was in that for my first two years." I dodged her questions about the remaining members of the group, and cited my reasons for leaving as "I didn't think I'd have the time this year." I love a cappella, and my personal feelings toward a particular group shouldn't affect the opinions of others... I didn't feel the need to vent all my frustration concerning Tritones. Their problems are not mine anymore, and I don't feel badly for letting it all go to shit. The thing is... they do a pretty good job of ruining themselves without any petty slandering on my part. I'd much prefer to watch them burn of their own accord. It just makes it that much more satisfying.

OK. So maybe I'm still harboring some less than cordial feelings. But the fact of the matter is, I've accepted that I'm not continuing in collegiate a cappella. I've found a way to return to my classical upbringing. I've been privileged enough to have received an offer to do a little dabble in a cappella next summer at choir camp. (Running a workshop for choir geek seniors in high school looking to join a cappella groups their freshman years) That will be enough for me.

And I'm happy now. If I hadn't been so frustrated, I would have never quit with just a month or so to go like I had. And if I hadn't quit... I would never have become so close to Katie, Jazz, Umi, Jess, and all my other international girlfriends. And I would never have met Mike.

So as much as I harbor anger with regards to my experience in the Tritones... my hat goes off to them with gratitude. My deepest thanks for driving me away from a lifelong dream and towards the love of my life.